"Because You Aren't Doing S%!T With Your Life"

By GuestBug TOAR

Hello My Lovelies by inheritance! It's TOAR here with more Random Writing Chaos!
This Month is about a friend's heartbreak.

I have REPEATEDLY written about worthless friends because that is
something that I hold true to my heart. Since I am an only child, I look
for companionship through the relationships that I have with other
people, especially my friends.

In High School, I was the girl that was friends with everybody - pretty
damn popular but not in the 'Skank' kinda way. I was captain of almost
all of the girls sports teams and Senior Class President. I had a fucked
up attitude when I was pissed off but overall, I was pretty outgoing and
down to earth. Back then I had 3 best friends. I couldn't believe it!
Some people aren't even blessed to have 1 but I had 3. Therefore I was
officially the shit - one for every occasion: party chick, emotional,
and the one.

Party Chick and I always went out - one whole summer of partying. It
didn't matter where or when - we were there. Emo, well she was always
there when I was feeling insecure and vice versa. The One - we've been
friends for about 10 years now, before high school she was there.

It is better to be in chains with friends , than to be in a
garden with strangers.

Now that I am in my last year of college - I am only down to "The One."
Emotional got exchanged because of lack of contact for another emotional
in college. Then EMO #2 dipped out on me because she was jealous of my
relationship (same with party chick) and her "fiance" didn't like that I
made my own decisions, in a nut shell. This one hurt the most.

All of my Friends, The One included, got jealous of my continuing
education. I feel like either you are going to get on my band wagon and
do something positive with your life, or you aren't. I don't want to
affiliate my self with people who can't determine where their life is
going or have any goals to get there. Now I am not saying that you have
to go to a 4 year university and become a rocket scientist, but damn -
not sitting at home with your momma all day playing video games; going
to the club every weekend and spend your last $10 to get in; asking
where the weed man is at. Luckly for The One, she hopped on - otherwise
her ass was going to get dismissed too. I hate to sound like a bitch but
it is the truth.

People come into
your life for
a REASON, a SEASON, or a LIFETIME,
when you figure out which it is,
you know exactly what to do.

So here is the point. I just learned the lesson of friends. You grow up
and grow apart, loss of contact, or jealousy all plays a role. In all
these situations, the biggest factor I seen was the relationships. I
just want to know why? I am the kind of person that doesn't care if your
boyfriend doesn't like my high spirit or my potty mouth; I am YOUR
friend, not his. I can tolerate him because I love YOU. Why did you care
if my ring looked better then yours? Why can't you have a brain of your
own? Why can't you decipher between "girl friend talk" and "relationship
talk"? Why did you pick HIM over ME?

Let's get this straight, I haven't been the "Saint" of friendships
either but throughout all of my discrepancies, I came back to apologize
and make right because like I said before, nothing is more important to
me than my close friends.

I figured out that I just won't talk about my relationships with my
friends. The good or bad. It is so messed up that I had to loose so many
and experience so much friendship heartbreak it will scar me for life.
But that is the price you pay when you want a positive circle around you
and in the end, positive people will just gravitate into your life and
everyone's happy! I hope to find my "Sex in the City Friends."

PS. Do you ever notice how women just talk to their bff's about the
bad shit in their relationship?

A real friend is
one who walks in when the rest of the world walks
out.

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View More From TOAR on Junebug
Talks.
Follow and Comment on TOAR's Personal Blog at Thoughts of a Randomista.
Contact TOAR to guest post on your blog at thoughtsofarandomista@gmail.com.

Last Month in BugLand - September 2010

It's a BUG world!

Just in case you forgot to stop by JuneBug Talk (JBT) in September, do yourself a favor and catch up. Kidding! Here's what you missed.

Miss Berneta
BernetaBug opened up with a very personal post On Being Black, Female, and Queer. Want more from your fave intellectual, B? Read more of her blogs over at Nickel for a Thought.

Mz Kewe
She spoke her piece on celebrity homewreckers and asked whose the real one to blame in The Problem I Have with Homewreckers. To hear more from the "The Queen of All Controversy," tune in to Check2Check Radio online by clicking here or follow @SweetKewe on Twitter.

Ms MaShari
Remixing a track by Kanye the way she only can, Ms MaShari blogged on pop culture personal finance and the importance of giving back in Power. Hit up your girl via email with questions or at Young Women and Supporters of Financial Literacy on Facebook.

Miss Qui Vive
Continuing her series, Miss Qui explored the causes in Back to the Future: The Effects. Are you a reader? So is QV! Join QV's virtual book society, The Burgeoning Literate.

Don't forget our roundtable discussion titled,

"MEN vs. WOMEN: Who has the Advantage in Dating?"

featuring our NEW GuestBug justJames.

GuestBugs
Brilliance returned with REAL Talk in The Best Father Around, and Thoughts of a Randomista told us her take on protection in Babygirl, You Gone Wrap It or Not?!?.

Interested in guest blogging? Click here, read Miss Berneta's post, and send us an email at bugme.junebugtalk@gmail.com.

PartnerBugs
JBT stepped outside of the box and partnered with No4Corners and Thoughts of a Randomista. Be sure to checkout our PartnerBugs and more of our work at:

...No4Corners (N4C)

Miss Qui Vive lended her opinion on dating or the lack there of over at N4C's with What Do the Lonely Do. In Billy Jean: Is Michael the Baby Daddy?, Ms MaShari talked about Mocienne Pettit Jackson, MJ's alleged lovechild. As for Miss B, she asked a good question - "Can you be Too Picky in Love?" Leave your comments and let us know what you think. Lastly, Mz Kewe got more stuff of her chest in the Top 10 Total BS! Propaganda in the Media, Society, and World in General....

....Thoughts of a Randomista (T.O.A.R.)

'Shari dished her random thoughts on money and hot totties in Urban Finance, and B shared her very own tales of money woes in Guilty Pleasures.

Thanks for reading, and a special thanks to our GuestBugs and Partners!
Stay tuned for more JuneBug Talk.


Coming in October...

• More from JuneBugs' Miss Berneta, Mz Kewe, Ms MaShari, and Miss Qui Vive on any and ERRthing like dating & relationships, politics, culture, etc.
• Posts from GuestBugs' Brilliance, T.O.A.R., justJames, and many more.

Support JuneBug Talk. Like us on Facebook at http://facebook.com/likejunebugtalk!

Cheating Marriages

By GuestBug TOAR

TOAR is back bitches! If have no idea who I am, your bad. Sike naw! Lol here is a little "Tid-Bit":

Let's Cut to the chase, she is not some bubbly censored bimbo. She's a 20 something college student living in "urban" Detroit, MI where you get the shit slapped out of you if you step on a guy's J's and being a Harajuku Barbie or a 5 Star Chick is a profession. She talks shit about most things and make fun of everything else - Sex & Race mostly because it is the most Taboo. She also goes off on crazy tangents in "(parenthesis)." TOAR calls it her own personal "random writing chaos." Even though she creates hell when she write about these subjects, she likes to know that at Thoughts of a Randomista, she creates a safe place to express her ideas while receiving feedback from her readers. TOAR Loves The Twilight Saga (TEAM EDWARD, his messy bed hair makes her drool) and Guest Bloggers. And she HATES introductions!

ANYWAY back to cheating marriages. This is not the same fun loving post as "BabyGirl you gone wrap it or not?" I think cheating marriages can be expressed two ways: committed and non-committed.

Let's examine non-committed first! Personally, I have been engaged for 2 years now and I am so still totally freaked out by the word marriage. Like so many others, being married is sacred to me. I don't care if it is between a man and a woman or same sex - love is love. A fairy tale. A twilight romance. Everyone has their ups and downs but how much is too much and FOREVER?! It is kinda overwhelming. So in this sense cheating marriage is postponing it because you are totally freaked out - like me.

I mean I am committed to my fiance' and I am totally in love with him so I should want to jump the broom right? I don't feel like I have any wild oats to sow up so what's the problem? I just think that I want to make sure but I am also not ready. I don't believe in divorce so this would be it for me. Can we say cold feet? Idk. He is the one for me I know but ugh forever? I sound like a dude. I guess we've been together 6 years so far, that's almost forever in a sense. You know, in a "year-to-date" kinda way. That's almost 1/4th of my life lol.

Let me get on to the second part of the post and another reason why I am so totally freaked out: committed to marriage. Well like I said before marriage is the happily ever after - the fairytale. All of is girls grew up with cinderella and prince charming so we are already programed to look for our prince charming. I just realized at the age of 22, not all prince charmings are perfect. They are still human. So now the point. People who are in marriages cheat. Not all people, but the ones you least expect. Like for instance, a friend of mine's aunt and uncle have been together for 36 years. But come to find out he has cheated on her dozens of times. But they are still together. They still are married and in love. But I don't want that kind of marriage. Marriage is hard work. Wow it just put things in prospective for me.

That wasn't the only case. Come to find out, many people do it regularly. Like it's supposed to be like that. NOOO! Is my marriage doomed before it starts?

I've made some mistakes and so has my fiancé. Do I continue to let the past burden our future?

So how much is too much? Forgiveness? Love? Cheating?! Ugh. Some fairytales exists, just prince charming isn't so perfect.

FYI- females, you bitches aren't excluded either. Slores.
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Follow and comment TOAR at Thoughts of a Randomista.

Babygirl, You Gone Wrap It or Not?!?

By GuestBug TOAR

I am TOAR and I was thinking about condoms. (Bio Below Post) All kinds of condoms. Penis Condoms, Women Condoms, Finger Condoms and Tongue condoms. Of course, TOAR promotes safe sex - you know penis condom and female condoms. But what about the other two?

Finger Condoms
I was in a dirty sex shop last week (I go there frequently, because I like looking at dildos) and I was paying for my sexfit (sexy-outfit) and I seen these little round rubbery things. No bigger then your pinky finger. I asked the sales associate about them and she told me what they were. Ok, now here is the problem I am seeing with these little bastards: Why would I put a little ass condom on my PINKY finger?


First of all, a PINKY finger has no control over how to play with my clitoris effectively enough without it tickling like hell therefore, EFFECTIVELY turning me off. Secondly, those things look like they will cut off the guys circulation, especially if they have huge hands (big hands, big penis - PERIOD). Then they have two huge hands with 9 fingers? EEEWWW.


So I get the whole "Lets-use-little-finger-fuckers-because-you-might-have-AIDS-anyway" thing but seriously?


Tongue Condoms
Same Day, next to the mini condoms are the "Tongue Condoms." Now I have never heard of these before in my life. I hate the way latex tastes from a regular penis condom so why on earth will I WILLINGLY stick latex in my mouth? ugh.


I just have no more words.


So here are my posing questions to all of you out there:

• Have you ever used a finger condom?
• How far will you go to protect yourself?
• Do you give oral with the condom on? Do you like it?
• Do you like to receive oral with a condom on (tongue or otherwise)?
• Do you clean under your nails frequently?

More importantly, assuming that we all use the basic forms for condoms, Babygirl, are you gone wrap his fingers or not?


Please guys, answer too!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Follow and Comment TOAR's personal posts at Thoughts of a Randomista. Let's Cut to the chase, she is not some bubbly censored bimbo. She's a 20 something college student living in "urban" Detroit, MI where you get the shit slapped out of you if you step on a guy's J's and being a Harajuku Barbie or a 5 Star Chick is a profession. She talks shit about most things and make fun of everything else - Sex & Race mostly because it is the most Taboo. She also goes off on crazy tangents in "(parenthesis)." TOAR calls it her own personal "random writing chaos." Even though she creates hell when she write about these subjects, she likes to know that at Thoughts of a Randomista, she creates a safe place to express her ideas while receiving feedback from her readers. TOAR Loves The Twilight Saga (TEAM EDWARD, his messy bed hair makes her drool) and Guest Bloggers. And she HATES introductions!